romanticizing the dark

drastic measures

for minor issues

restless nights

and drowsy days

caustic thoughts

and paradoxical behavior

take your pills

take a breath

they told you that would help

just give it another week

so close

the wind came
you saw dreams
disseminating through tree-tops
floating next to plastic bags and dead leaves
you reached out to catch one
and fell through the ground
you beheld a final fleeting glance of the sky
it looked back with pity


at a loss for hope
no room for error
no room for feelings

magic pills
what kind of magic is this?
a loss of self
unfound to begin with
a personality propped up by pharmaceuticals
determined by a daily regimen
shaped by foreign chemicals

is this you?
or is this a better you?


past the shoreline
past the horizon
but still not far enough

the luxurious lies, the decadent digressions;
just paddles for a sinking ship

living was never an option;
the levee broke
and cement filled the cracks in the silver linings

do you trust completely anymore?
remember with nostalgia?
feel with totality?
love with truth?

you used to be a shell of yourself
now I don’t even recognize you
a million faces and not one of them is yours